Books play a huge role in my life. If you have ever read (or seen) In Her Shoes, the way that Rose feels about shoes is how I feel about books.
“When I am having a bad day I like to treat myself. Clothes never look any good, food just makes me fatter, but shoes always fit.”
Books always fit. They are my happy place. So imagine my surprise when they were no longer making me happy. How can this be? Books have been my constant companion since I was eight, but to find that in my thirties I could no longer enjoy them worried me. So I prayed about it.
What?!? You prayed over books?? Yes, yes I did. I did more than that. I gave God the control over my reading life. I didn’t discuss it with anyone. I didn’t even make a deliberate decision in the way of “God, I will only read this book if you speak to me and give me the okay.” I just quit looking for something else to fill the emptiness that I had felt for so long and decided to be still. When I felt lead to read, I read. Some of the books were on faith, others were biographies or YA. I left myself open to new book experiences.
I didn’t think anyone would notice
I was talking to a friend the other day and something she said caught me by surprise. We were talking about books, per usual, and she said, “ You know, I use to know what to suggest to you to read, but you’re reading all these different type of books lately.”
When I got home, I took a look around at my many stacks of TBR books and she was right. Once upon a time, my shelves would have been filled with YA novels and the latest J.R. Ward release, but now I see contemporary novels, biographies, and self exploration books along side them. My go to books were no longer my go to books and I didn’t even notice that it changed.
The last couple of years I have tried to live my life with one main thought in mind. “Be still and know that I am God.” This is with all things in my life, but I focus more on my stress and control issues. I never thought it would influence my reading.
I am not one to look for instructions on how to live my life, but the last couple of years haven’t been the easiest. By giving it to God, I’ve found books that have helped me during this season of my life and have allowed me to grow. Giving up the control is not easy and I struggle everyday to grab it back, but I know He has a better plan for me than what I could ever imagine for myself.
Have you read a book that changed your life? Let me know in the comments.
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